Over the past 30 plus years, researchers have extensively studied the risks to children before, during and after parental separation and divorce and also what helps them to stay resilient to the stresses of change and to thrive.
The results are quite clear in some ways. On-going conflict between their parents is very damaging to children whether their parents are still married and living together or separated and living in 2 households. One child’s description illustrates this well. This boy explained that he felt like half Mom and half Dad, so when Mom and Dad were fighting it felt like the two halves of him were fighting against each other. Fortunately, resolving parental conflict has been shown to support children’s self esteem.
Children are buffered from the stress of the separation by having a strong relationship with Mom, a strong relationship with Dad, and, of course, protection from conflict between them.
I work with parents to support them in their intentions to create the safest and most loving and supportive environment for their children in their 2-household family.
- Collaborative Practice; Putting Families First by Dr Susan Gamache (3pp)
- Collaborative Practice; A New Opportunity to Address Children’s Best Interests in Divorce by Dr Susan Gamache (2005) Louisiana Law Review (31pp)
- Talking To Your Children About Separation and Divorce: Some Ideas and Tips to Help You Do It Right by Dr Joan Kelly
